4 easy steps guaranteed to make you SMILE!

Rejected by the guys whom you thought you’ll say ‘forever’ or he abandons you in the middle of nowhere without a word.

Maybe, you don’t like what you see in the mirror and seems that no one even finds you charming.

Better yet, you gave up because no one finds you attractive!!

Well… im no expert but everything i have described are the one i feel… today.

but there is yearning voice at the back of my head YELLING ‘SNAP OUT OF IT…MORON”. And we come to realize that listening would’nt hurt a bit but rather help us in finding ourselves once again.  Finally, another lightbulb moment: We fail to be happy cause we are not satisfied with what we have.

So here are a few satisfaction guidelines that i could you share and i hope that will help you as well:

do not hold on to something that would never be yours


do not fight for someone not worth fighting for


do not cry for something lost, gone and inevitable




appreciate what you have and be thankful for whatever things people give you

happiness is a mere conduct of the mind. Everyone can be happy as long as they really want too.

I want to be HAPPY and I WILL….

the Art of Letting Go (part 5)

MANTRA 41: when you hold someone, hold them like it’s the last time you’ll ever see them and when they go… don’t make reasons for them to stay… make reasons for them to return

MANTRA 42: In your life, you’ll take note of a lot of people.

One’s with whom you shared something special, will always mean something.  There’s the one you 1^st kissed, the one you first loved, the one who 1^st broke your heart, the one you’ll put on pedestal, the one your with right now and the who got away.

That person with whom everything was perfect but timing was just wrong.  No fault in the person, no flaw in the chemistry, but the cards just don’t fall the right way

MANTRA 43: the sand thought me ONE THING “you cant hold on too many things, no matter what you do to make them stay, and no matter how much they want to stay, the wind will always blow them away”

so learn to let go and choose carefully which you want to stay, because like the sand, ‘only’ those which are in the center of your palm will last…

MANTRA 44: whats the difference between MOVED ON and I FORGOT YOU ALREADY.. wanna know?

When you say I FORGOT YOU ALREADY, you totally accept the fact that the person you call mine is not yours anymore.

But when you say I moved on, you just realized that its over but the feeling is still there.  Youre just ignoring it….

MANTRA 45: All suffering is caused by being in the wrong place.  If your unhappy where you are …

MOVE

MANTRA 46: Do you know that the heart has no pain receptors?  So the next time someone breaks your heart, move on.  Your pain is just an illusion.  A temporary psychological disturbance that you have to overcome

MANTRA 47:

No one ever gets tired of loving,

‘but everyone gets tired of waiting, assuming, hearing lies, saying sorry and hurting.

So snap out of it and learn to let go

MANTRA 48:

You should not be sorry bout love.

Rather it should make you wonder that if you were once happy with the wrong one, how much more when the right one comes.

MANTRA 49: Ang pinakamahirap na parte ng paglayo sa taong di ka kayang mahalin, ay ang … bonggang bongang katotohanang di ka niya hahabulin

MANTRA 50:

if theres one thing ive learned from falling in LOVE

its to stand up no matter how painful the cuts;

to fight for what I believe in and to wait.

Because even if I think now is the right time to give extra effort – waiting is even worth it

the most heart breaking text messages i have read… (series 5)

HANKY 41

Too many LIES can weaken one’s trust…

Too much BETRAYALS can cause a person to be afraid

And the sad truth is …

Too much PAIN felt by a loving heart can cause it to freeze

 

Till it goes numb by the never ending pain,

Until it doesnt feel any love… anymore.  (Sad but true)

 

HANKY 42

To love someone doesn’t mean to commit with that person.

Sometimes you just have to be satisfied with whatever connection you have with that special one.

Isn’t it sad when you are so much in love right now, but you cant freely let it out?

And your so damn scared to show it to all cause of one reason?  ITS COMPLICATED

 

 

HANKY 43

Are we really hurt because we can’t tell the person we love what we really feel? Or are we hurt because at the back of our minds we know that telling the object of our affection what we really feel wont make any difference

 

HANKY 44

People must try to be sensitive…

cause not everyone is strong enough to endure pain.

After all there’s no anesthesia for a broken heart

 

HANKY 45

What makes us a FOOL??? When it hurt us to the core seeing the one you love with somebody else, but still, you keep on staring.

 

HANKY 46

UNCERTIANITY is the biggest torture in love.

You feel jealous yet you cant complain. You can get hurt yet you cant show it. You can love with your all yet you cant say it. All you can do is watch, keep the pain, enjoy, the smiles, hugs and kisses then show how much that person means to you

HANKY 47

The love you cant have….

Last’s the longest

Feels the strongest

And hurts the MOST.

 

HANKY 48

Akala mo hindi ka niya mahal dahil mas pinili nyang maging magkaibigan na lang kayo….

pero ang hindi mo alam… higit ka niyang mahal dahil pinili niya kung saan kayo mas magtatagal

(this message really makes me cry…why cant we be more than friends – AJ)

 

HANKY 49

In this world, it’s hard to tell who’s true and who’s not

People may be good at the beginning and be cruel in the end;

If your too trusting, they’ll take advantage of you;

if they know your weak, they’ll hurt you and suck the blood our from your veins;

after loving them, they’ll leave you behind… gasping for air.

The Art of Letting Go – (cartoon edition)

Cartoons are not just your average children’s past time… it gives a distinctive lesson when times get tough and the only thing left to say is ‘goodbye’.  But the mere fact of letting thy parting words depart on thy sweet lips takes a lot of guts and courage and you need ‘someone’ to hold on to draw the power seems to be impossible, i would recommend that you get your nephews cartoon collection and swing those DVD’s to your player and drown yourself with their animated world.

Yup, because beyond the entertainment value it may give you to lighten thy burden, it imparts valuable lessons as well.  Read the quotes below and may you garner the strength to move on.

No matter how we try to be mature…

we will always be a kid when we all get hurt and cry

– Peter Pan

so shed thy tears.  Its OK! Even if your a guy.

It would ease up the burden and it wouldnt cause a penny to your manhood

Paano ba namamatay ang tao?

Pag binaril ba siya?

Pag nilason?

Pag hindi na humihinga?

Sabi sa ONE PIECE ANIME

Namamatay lang ang tao

Pag wala na siya sa puso at isipan ng iba.

Were so busy watching out for what’s just ahead of us

that we don’t take time to enjoy where we are – Calvin and Hobbes

Some things aren’t meant to be kept forever.

You know you have to stop and let go when things aren’t going right and everything you did is unappreciated…

Remember what batman says?

Its wiser to be alone but happy…

than with somebody who does nothing while your doing everything

The Art of Letting Go (special post)

Yahoo.com posted and written by SkyCaster (Oct 6, 2009) which i felt its meant to be re-posted for my dear readers of  “the Art of Letting Go’ series… read on

Breakup Recovery 101: Five Rules You Must Follow!

Whether or not you were together for two weeks, six months, or four years, breakups hurt. And they can be really hard to get over. If you listen to the wise words of Charlotte on Sex and the City, it takes half the time you were together to get over him. Here are a few more wise words to help make your next breakup a little easier.

Don’t Talk to Him

The most crucial rule in breaking up is to not talk to the person you’re breaking up with. Even if you think you can handle it and still get over the person, you can’t. Don’t kid yourself; feelings will get hurt. Take some time off, get over him, and maybe someday in the future you’ll be friends. Until then, lick your wounds and recover any way you’d like; whether that be partying hard, staying in bed for days with pints of ice cream, or spending absurd amounts of money on clothes you don’t need. No one will say a thing; we all heal in our own, weird ways.

Snap Out of It

Remember how things, like stupid songs and movies and that little spot in the park that you two went to on your first date used to be “yours”? Well, they’re not anymore. Don’t make a connection to platonic objects when there isn’t one. Remind yourself that you like that spot in the park because of the good view, not because of anyone connected to it. There’s no point losing more than you have to from a breakup, so don’t get all sappy on yourself.

Reconnect with Your Friends

No matter how much you say you’re not going to be that girl who gives up her friends for her boyfriend; everyone gives up a little of their time to spend with their guy. Well, now is the time to make it up to them (and, you could use the girl talk). So, go out and have fun; grab your best wing woman, and remember how much fun being single really is.

Take Some Time For Yourself

Amidst all of this trying not to talk to him, hanging out with friends, partying more and/or eating lots and lots of ice cream-you need to remember to sit back and actually work through your feelings. Understand why things went south, and why you’re better off this way. And in no time you’ll be back to your old self, and what’s-his-name will be a thing of the past.

It’s All About Rewards

And finally, do all of the little things that make you happy every day. Yep, being single means thinking about you, you, you. So, go and take that extra time after work and buy yourself that little ring you’ve been obsessing over. Or take a long walk and meet a friend for cupcakes because well, you can. Have fun spoiling yourself, because you deserve it after….wait, what? I’m forgetting already.

a battered wife’s dilemma

” you guys are lucky for being single me myself… i don’t know i am so messed up i got three kids I’m 22 married to a 36 year old who doesn’t have a stable job who hurts me whenever i don’t follow what he tells me or whenever i do or say something that would insult or hurt him. To think he has so little money but he still gets to have other women. he sleeps with her once a week the woman is a doctor, maybe you guys are wondering why I’m still with him… cause I’m still hoping it will still work out”

The above statement was posted by one of our dear readers from ‘the art of letting go series’.  I can’t help but wonder ‘… for love is like an ocean, its mysteries cannot be revealed nor explained in once lifetime.’

First, I would like to thank you for giving this blog an opportunity to listen to thy current predicament and I hope other readers would also have an opportunity to share their own stories.

I know you have all the right reasons why you are still staying with the relationship and I don’t place fingers on it since your shoes are hard to fill in.  But let me provide tell the story of my own sister which is almost the same as yours.

My sister married a guy 10 years younger than her.  Though I and my parents felt it’s a whirlwind romance, we somehow accepted the fact that she chooses this guy because she is madly in love with and bearing their first child out from wedlock.  My neighbors say that he is a catch since he is young and good looking.  But they don’t know who he really is when he takes off his mask.

Yup…you may almost smell how I despised my sister’s husband.  He is lazy and all of his earning from being a cab driver was solely used by him.  He doesn’t even give any money to my sister though they have four kids.  They are practically living in our home and he doesn’t respect my parents and my sister.

My father nagged my sister to reach out for some ‘self worth’ but she ignored everything what he say, until my brother in law dragged my sister to Davao to establish their own.  A year after, she’s back with her children.  We though that she had finally came back to her senses but we are wrong… she is still carrying an excess baggage.

Till time had passed by, their relationship has gone from bad to worst.  My brother in law does not even share anything from the bills that I pay – from rent, food, electricity etc.  He only gives a sum of money to my sister which cannot last for a week.  Just imagine giving her Php 500.00 for a month’s expense.  How do you think his family will eat with that sum of money with four children to boot?  PLUS, he even has a mistress and has the nerve to bring him at home when i’m not around.  On top of that, he even hurts my sister when she disapproves or asked for extra money.

I have a hint that everything was happening inside our home but my sister kept on denying it.  She always had a lame excuse why she has a large black eye or a fresh wound off from her shoulders.

Until all hell breaks loose when I found out from my cousin that she has seen on her own eyes how miserable my sister is whenever I’m away.  She gave me the full story blow by blow – how she and my nieces skip their meals, how he beats her up and the so called mistress.

I and my sister have had a heart to heart talk…. I ask why he is sticking with the devil.  He said that she is waiting if his husband could still change.

I went berserk!!!   How long will she wait?  Horses will never wear stripes and even if chucks off a devils tail, they will still remain demons.  I ask what really matters, his husband’s transition or her hungry children.  At this point, she has to prioritize her four children ahead from any her plans.  It’s not their fault why they have a shitty father to begin with.  They never had a choice when they were born.  If self worth has already flown away from the window, then look to see your children’s needs

From there, my sister breaks her silence and a river of tears has finally left her eyes.  From there on, she made her first step to freedom…by leaving my brother in law once and for all.

The Art of Letting Go (Part 4)

Thank you so much for such huge feedback regarding this series of post – “the art of letting go’.  So here I am once again, as I serve the fourth series.  I hope you’ll enjoy this post as much as I have.  And on a personal note:  MANTRA 34 fits my current journey through love.

Readers, enjoy the post.

MANTRA 31

Don’t count what you’ve lost

but cherish what you have and plan what you want to gain.

The past never returns but the future may fulfill the loss

MANTRA 32

Don’t put your heart in someone else’s hand

till you’re sure that they wont let go when they get tired of holding it.

MANTRA 33

When you’ve found a reason to walk away…never look back.

Just keep on walking.

It’s better to get lost moving than to get stuck broken.

MANTRA 34

Bakit ka magpaparamdam sa taong di marunong makaramdam….

Wag kang magpakatanga sa taong di marunong magpahalaga

Matuto kang sumuko at mang-iwan, kung lagi ka namang sinasaktan

Imbis na magtanong ka ng ‘hindi pa ba sapat?’

Bakit hindi mo na lang kalimutan ang lahat

Kung alam mong binabaliwala ka na, tanggapin mong nagsasawa na siya.

Wag kang magpadala sa salitang ‘sorry’ at ‘ayokong mawala ka’

Kung totoo you…patunayan niya

MANTRA 35

There will come a point in your life when you’ll get tired of chasing everyone and trying to fix everything… but it doesnt mean you’re giving up. It’s just a realization that you don’t need all those you go after…because what you need are those even if you never needed them

MANTRA 36

It’s hard to open your eyes if your dreams are sweet…

But sometimes it’s a must to wake up

because it’s the only reasonable way to see reality

MANTRA 37

I personally believe that there are just two philosophies in love…

Number one is give the best you can

and second…never stay when you are not wanted anymore.

MANTRA 38

Never allow somebody to be your priority

when in fact you’re just his option.

MANTRA 39

A quote to live by:

Ang mabigat na bagay ay gumagaan kapag binitawan

Make sense?

Learn to let go when you’re hurting too much

MANTRA 40

The best feeling in the world is realizing you’re perfectly happy without the ‘thing’ you thought you needed the most

the ART of letting go (part 3)

currently, this is the most succesful series that i have for my blog.  thank you for the readers who continue leaving their messages and experiences based from the messages i have posted.  its truly remarkable and overwhelming.

i absolutely welcome negative remarks and dont worry, i understand every words that our dear readers left.  i dont hold anything (either grudges nor ill remarks).  i rather approve these comments so at least this post will somehow lift those excess baggage that our dear readers may have been keeping inside.

i firmly believe that once a person have been able write down his opinions about a topic that is closest to their hearts, its the first step in letting go because he/she finally admitted that he/she had these feelings all bottled up inside them.

they are just finding a way on how they could express it and i hope this series will be the way.  enjoy the rest of the post, people.

MANTRA 21

We used to think that life is a fairytale…full of magic, exciting and vivid!

But that was a long time ago…

How we know that there’s more to life than just ‘happy ever after…’

We decide, we struggle and somehow we begin to understand that we have the power to make each day better than yesterday…

We’ve learned that we get wiser each day and no fairy can lead us to a happy ending.

MANTRA 22

You can never find rest until you finally let go of the hatred that fills your heart.

Stop hating the person who hurts you.

It’s time to let go of the past and find mercy within your heart.

Remember that nobody is perfect, because even the most cautious man stumbles upon the smallest stone.

MANTRA 23

Sometimes the heroism in love is not only seen in the way you fought for it.

But in the way you surrendered it even though it was supposed to be perfect

MANTRA 24

It takes time to forget someone very special to you.

But sometimes we really have to move to face the fact that certain chapters of our lives should really be closed forever.

MANTRA 25

Life is like riding a bicycle, you have to balance everything and in order to maintain balance…you have to keep moving on.

MANTRA 26

Things just happen, things we may never understand.

But we just have to believe that it’s for the best, even if it doesn’t always seem that way.

MANTRA 27

Having a marvelous memory is great, but sometimes, the ability to forget is a lot better.

MANTRA 28

I hope that there will come a point in my life when my heart will grow tired.

Grow numb from hate.

Stop beating for love.

Run out of compassion.

Don’t soften from pain.

I hope all those will happen not because of insensitivity but because it will simply want to move on and live a new uncomplicated life.

MANTRA 29

The most logical work of philosophy is embodied in 10 words:

STAY if you are happy, LEAVE if you are not.

MANTRA 30

Don’t count what you’ve lost

But cherish what you have and plan what you want to gain.

The past never returns but the future may fulfill the loss

best friend … i love you

 

 

 

 

 

one of my readers from my old blog www.allanworld.i.ph posted who goes by the name,  EARTHY said:

 

 

I can’t believe how perfectly you’ve nailed how I’m feeling right now. I’m in love with my best friend, but he doesn’t love me. And yet I am always there for him whenever he needs me. I just can’t seem to get him out of my life. My friends tell me I need to forget him completely but how do you forget the other half of yourself? How do you pretend that your world isn’t cold and empty without that person in it?

How do you move on?

 

Actually, ilang beses rin naman akong nain-love sa kaibigan.  Based from my previous post, it serves as a living proof of my insane past. Below is just short list of related post.  Feel free to navigate my blog after reading this post.

 

>> THE ART OF CLOSING CHAPTERS

>> of LOVE and FRIENDSHIP…. (here WE go again)

>> a mantra for FRIENDS who fall in love with their BEST FRIENDS…

>> gOODBYE…OLE SAILOR

>> LOVE is CRUEL???

 

its really hard to overcome such feeling.  i mean, ive been there…and i know how hard it is.

 

Parati kayong magkasama at parati niyang binibida yung bagong crush or lover nya. Then iiyak siya dahil iniwanan o kaya ay sinaktan siya…and worst sayo pa hihingi ng payo.  He would gosh over his last nights eye ball and he would give you the blow by blow scenarios that started with a few beers that led to a room in a motel.  Ang masama pa nito, you have to pretend na nasisiyahan or naaliw ka sa mga kwento nya pero sa totoo lang…dumudugo na ng bongang bonga ang puso mo.

 

ITS REALLY HARD. halos iumpog na rin ako ng mga kaibigan ko noon dahil sa kabobohan ko pero ayun pa rin ako….head over heels.  Sari saring payo na rin ang narinig ko from ‘you should learn to move on’ to ‘magkaibigan lang talaga ang tingin nya sa iyo’

 

Ang parati kong sagot sa kanila, ‘sino ba sila at kung ganun ganun na lang kung makapagpayo sila sa akin?’.  Alam ba nila kung ano ang nararamdaman ko ngayon?  Ni sa dulo ng kalingkingan nila, hindi nila alam ang sakit na nararamdaman ko ngayon.

 

Points taken….

 

But the BIG QUESTION is ‘how will you be able to express your affection to a guy na ang tanging tingin nya sayu ay isang kaibigan lang?  Would you be able to face the fact na once you tell him the truth, he would leave you behind?  Would you be able to face the world and move on?  Kaya mo bang masikmura kung ano ang sasabihin nya sayo?  Can you?

 

ARRRRGHHHH! ansakit di ba.

 

there are no easy answer to ‘our’ situation.  ONLY YOU CAN ANSWER YOUR OWN QUESTION.  because it really depends on how you are determined to over come the feeling. 

 

Will you bite the bullet?

Are you ready to face the TRUTH?

 

I have made my decision to finally say my feelings to ‘him’.  I think that was time that I finally admitted that he would never be mine and he belongs to someone else.  I just have to know the truth so I bite the bullet.  Masakit ma-reject because I lost two people when I finally had the strength to tell him that im in love with him – I lost my best friend and my love one.  I think I would rather bleed to death than pass this lifes journey without even knowing what will be the outcome.  I think we all have to hurdle life difficulties to define who we are today.

 

I know the consequences of my action and tangap ko kung anuman ang sasabihin niya.  Eventually, i rely to father time to heal my wounds and forget every sweet memories ive had with him.

 

 

will you STAY or will you LET GO?

 

 

Here is a short message from one of our readers that I would like to share

 

‘i just broke up with my boyfriend. we are in a homosexual relationship. We loved each other so much. He means everything to me. But when i ask of us to get back together. He doesn’t want. How should i go through this. I really love him and i want to continue this relationship. i’m ready to do anything to get him back with me. I’m staying with him. Should i consider moving out of his house?’

 

dilemma.  I can still remember one of the phrases uttered by Shakespear himself ‘to be or not to be’

 

honestly, there are no right or wrong answer to your question.  It really depends. It’s a case to case basis and we have to weigh each scenario that may lead to one or another.  For whatever the result, we have to keep in our hearts the bravery to face the journey after.

 

Based from what you have written, I don’t know why you two broke up…  but it seems that you and your ex-boyfriend are still living in one roof.  Your tried to win him over again and patch things up but he felt that it’s the end of the road.  Am I right?? (I hope)

 

If this is the case, have you ever tried to ask him why?  Have you ever tried to ask him at least 15 minutes of his time to talk things over just for you to know.  If placing his reasons through words will help you understand, even if it’s a bitter pill that is hard to swallow, then let him speak up.  If you felt that the world may have been crashing benetah your feet while he explains his side, then allow yourself to shed tears.  If this is the only way to lighten up your load.   If, for him, everything has ended, isnt it high time that you have to admit to yourself that its time to let go?

 

YOU OWE IT TO YOURSELF.

 

You may say, its easier said than done.  YES…. I KNOW.  I have been there and letting go is one of the hardest decision that I have ever made.  But it always takes that one step for freedom.  Unless youll never make that step, youll never know what is beyond that door.

 

You have a life ahead.  And he has a life to lead as well.  You both need the ability to let go and find another way and if life leads you on the same path tommorrow…then probably you two are meant for each other – forever.

 

PS: dear readers, feel free to leave your comment below.